So your new year’s resolution is to get skinny, but you detest the smell of the gym, think your feet look fugly in sneakers and most importantly, can’t afford a gym membership. So what do you do? The good ‘ol gals at Beauty Blitz would tell you to pucker up and smack yourself skinny.

Confused, apparently some marketing schmucks called up whatever chemical plant creates lip gloss and asked them to add some L-carnetine and chromium, along with hydroxycitric acid extract into the mix. These ingredients are proven to boost metabolism, curb hunger and widdle your waist. So they put it in lip gloss and apparently it makes you skinny. (My medical advisor laughed hysterically when I told him this btw.) In fact, those metabolic boosters work best when found in natural foods and the traces in the lip gloss are likely nil. For what it’s worth, there may be a placebo affect going on here. Isn’t it really just mind over matter anyway?

Both Two Faced and Purple Labs have versions, the latter cleverly called “Huge Lips Skinny Hips” as it has a lip plumping agent as well. If this article hasn’t totally fine-tuned your doubts, give it a go. It beats the smell of sweat any day of the week.

Emma Dinzebach

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